This question is so difficult for me. And I’ve tried to write this post many times and I gave up. So here at the new year, I am back at it. Trying to answer, “How do I want to feel within my relationships?”

In my life, I want to feel peace and tranquility. Thus my relationships need to support that goal to have peace and tranquility but what does that mean? There are so many types of relationships and you can’t feel the same in all of them.

• My relationship with myself is where I want to feel comfortable. I want to be me and to be comfortable in being me.
• My relationship with my spouse is where I want to feel safe. I want no fear in being myself or expressing myself.
• My relationship with my children is where I want to feel joy. I want to feel joy in their personalities, eccentricities, fascinations, accomplishment, failures and joy in who they are.
• My relationship with my friends is where I want to feel understood and supported. I want to share the highs and lows, to feel I am not alone and to laugh at all of life’s absurdities.
• My relationship with neighbors and acquaintances is where I want to feel generosity and grace. I want to offer what I have and never covet what they have. I want to release judgement and fear of being judged and give grace where there is usually anger or annoyance.
• My relationship with strangers is where I want to feel helpful. I want to send good out into the world by opening doors, smiling, giving a helping hand.
• My relationship with those I agree with and those I don’t is where I want to feel curiosity. I want to feel curiosity in their opinions and in finding out what led to those opinions. Instead of agree or trying to change minds, I want to know the experience that led to them.

And through all these relationships and feelings, I want fun because life is so much better with fun.